From Sat, the 18th - Mon, the 20th, I took my road trip to Minnesota, leaving Florida behind.  Below are my thoughts, hallucinations, musings, text messages, and the moments that got me through a fifth of the country.
I am ignoring the fact that I missed my flight back to FL the day before, putting me a few hours behind schedule.
I am ignoring the fact that I locked myself of my apartment the night before, causing me to awkwardly walk around my building until someone turned off a light, so I knocked on her window knowing that she was awake.
Those things never happened.
This is about what happened after I crammed my life in to my Pontiac G6.
And hit the road.
Saturday, June 18
9:02 AM:  Sweaty. [after being asked how's the final packup going?]
2:12 PM:  On my way home... Minny, see you in a few days.
3:08 PM:  (passed through several huge rainstorms)  Let's time this one...
3:14 PM:  6 minutes... oh Florida!
3:30 PM:  Ok this is like the 4th pocket of rain, Florida must be sad I'm leaving.
4:07 PM:  So those gatorade bottles are too big to drink the last drops.  My ceiling gets in the way...
4:15 PM:  Guess how many windows I can see out of.  2.3. 
5:22 PM:  Ok I know you can't see it, but that cloud totally looks like 
Yoshi! 
5:24 PM:  It had the saddle and everything!    [where did you find that?]
5:25 PM:  Georgia's clouds > Florida's clouds.  I have no idea where I am. 
6:15 PM:  Gray, GA has the most badass squad cars ever
6:51 PM:  If FL was sad, GA must be PISSED!  This looks a little on the scary/fun side :) 
7:03 PM:  [I just can't imagine why Georgia's so mad at you...]
7:05 PM:  "Stay the f*** in Florida!" (Georgia, 2011).
7:56 PM:  P.S. I wish I could show you how beautiful this is- it's distracting! 
8:12 PM:  Did you live on Ultimate Drive?  [Upon realizing the hotel I was staying at was right down the road from where my brother lived in Athens, GA]
Sunday, June 19
8:39 AM:  On the road again- just can't wait to get on the road again
10:16 AM:  Oh hey North Carolina!  I'll be on the lookout for Petey Pablo 
11:37 AM:  Holy smokes the Smokies are incredible!  This state is the only Ten-i-see!
11:39 AM:  P.S. I think I need Ollie Williams here to predict the weather...  
It's gon' rain!
11:59 AM:  Guess where I'm going to be tomorrow   [Hawaii?]
   Close.  Minnesota.
1:28 PM:  Eew... Kentucky...
2:23 PM:  Do you like mexican slash will you be in the mood for mexican?
2:24 PM:  Yes and always :)
2:25 PM:  Sorry... Si!
3:32 PM:  For real... I haven't made it through 1 state without getting dumped on!
4:01 PM:  O-H!
4:11 PM:  I-O!  Hooray!
4:15 PM:  I never thought I'd say this, but I'm so glad I'm in Ohio!  No more KY
11:32 PM:  had the most epic adventures with  in Oxford, OH! Couldn't ask for a better way to spend the day!
Monday, June 20
8:29 AM:  Ok this rain thing needs to stop
9:27 AM:  Currently 65 degrees in indiana.  I haven't seen 65 in months!  Yessss!
10:37 AM:  I'm going to be in Gary, IN in a little while.  Jealous??
12:44 PM:  As much as I adore this city [Chicago], but I need to get the f*** out of here.  This traffic is the worst
12:55 PM:  That's why it doesn't get to be the First City
12:56 PM:  But it is number one (middle finger)
2:19 PM:  Oh p.s. I just crossed into wisconsin!  So close!
2:27 PM:  Wait, where am I? 

3:42 PM:  [Arrive in Madison for dinner.  Read book for a bit in church parking lot waiting for friends]
4:48 PM:  [Arrive at restaurant.  Get a phone call from Johnson & Wales University in Denver, offering me a job.  Holy crap!]
5:00-10:00 PM:  Make a bunch of phone calls and ride home on pure adrenaline.  This part is a blur.
11:03 PM:  [Arrive home in Eagan, MN]
Home sweet home.
What a whirlwind of a few days!