Back On The Wheel

I am a runner.

If you look at this blog for 15 seconds you could figure that out easily.

For the majority of people that read my blog or follow me on facebook, you see the joys and successes of my running.  The races.  The medals.  The PRs.  The miles.  The weight loss.  So many amazing things have been attributed to my life as a runner, and I am so proud to call myself one.

But there's another side to the story.

I have a confession to make.

I have a motivation problem.

Maybe it's because as a middle and high schooler I ate and drank so much junk food and pop that eating healthy foods seems like a chore.  Maybe it's because I'd rather sit on the couch than head out for a 5 mile run.  Or maybe it's that I let everything else in my life become a higher priority and my health and fitness slides down the scale.

Whatever the reasons, I've been in a health rut for the past 6 months.  Off-and-on levels of motivation have led to ups and downs- physically and mentally.  I am one of those people that when I am doing well and running consistently, a 5 mile run feels simple and free.  But when I am not doing well, a 2 mile run becomes a battle.  Every workout seems like a drastic chore, and it's not that I don't want to work out, but it's more so that the results and successes seem so impossibly far away that it isn't worth it.

Right now, I am in caught in an in-between. Mentally, I have every desire to work hard, focus, and achieve my goals of living a healthier life.  So I've been trying to trudge my way forward regardless of the voice inside saying it's easier to give up and be complacent.  But I feel stuck.

#suedle by Sue Caulfield

So this is my agreement I am making with myself.  It's time that I just suck it up and push myself.  It's time that throw the excuses out the window and make my health a priority.  And it's time that I love the journey again.

It's time that I love me again.

The drawing above is an original #suedle by the amazing Sue Caulfield.  Check out her blog at suecaulfield.com