Saturday, April 23, 2011

Letting Go... something I've always struggled with.

In some aspects, I am really good at it. I believe that everyone comes into your life and has a purpose, teaches you something, and even if for a brief moment, change your life. So when I drift apart from someone, I understand that it's a part of most relationships, yet I am grateful for the lessons I learn from everyone every day.

Over the past several years, I have have been living life with a sense of adventure- I've been lucky enough to travel to some cool places across the globe, transitioned from school to work to school, Minnesota & Wisconsin to Japan to Florida to Rhode Island back to Florida. With the opportunities I have had, I have met some of the most amazing people of my life. I get attached. I live, breathe, and bleed the experience taking everything in.

But the truth is, everything has an end. What has made it easier for me is knowing that another adventure lies in the horizon. So as time passes, I hold on to the memories, but have learned how to let go...

Yet here I am at the end of another adventure, and this one is hard -

During the past week, I have been reminded in amazing ways how special my life is down here.

I have fallen in love all over again with the water. I have found myself staring into the bay realizing how much I will miss it. Even after a year and 9 months, I still smile every time I see the ocean. If all goes to plan, I will be moving to a place by water, with mountains, but it won't be the same. I won't be able to drive 15 minutes to sit in shorts & a t-shirt, reading a book, and watching the most beautiful sunset. Even as I write this, I am looking into the black water, the reflections of light glistening with each ripple. So peaceful. So beautiful.

Through a series of events the past 3 days, I have been so proud and more inspired by the students that I work with at USF-St. Petersburg. Thursday night, we had a banquet celebrating the accomplishments of the year, and it was such a moving evening. From the excitement of everyone being together and being all dressed up, and recognizing the people that make up the heart and soul of the institution is refreshing. Taking a moment to remember all of the great things this campus has done over the past year (and last year too) was so incredible, and I have been honored to be along for the ride. Last night, we had our planning retreat for next fall, and we started the night off with a very simple activity that had a profound affect. We spent almost two hours answering questions about life, and listening to everyone's responses and seeing everyone open up with each other was great. Truly one of those rare moments that you feel blessed to be a part of. Even as I know I am saying goodbye in the near future, having conversations with the students and getting to know them in different ways has been incredible. Above anything, it has taught me that it is never to late to make a connection with somebody and gain something meaningful from them.

As I was sitting with some of the people in my cohort eating brunch this morning, it made me realize how much I will miss spending time with them. I am so thankful that my family could grow by 30 people, and they inspire me to be my best every day. I am lucky to call them my friends.

So, needless to say, this time around, letting go will be a challenge. I will never be able to erase these two years, and I will cherish all of the experiences that have made the past 2 years some of the best of my life. So instead of letting go, instead, I will keep this one tucked away. Because I am not ready to let go.

I think I'm going to hold onto this one a little bit longer...

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